Sermon for Nuptial Mass in Christmastide — Fr. Ermatinger

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Translation of the Epistle of St. Paul to the Ephesians (5:22-33)

Brethren, let wives be subject to their husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the Church. He is the savior of His body. Therefore, as the Church is subject to Christ, so also let the wives be to their husbands in all things. Husbands love your wives, as Christ also loved the Church, and delivered Himself up for it, that He might sanctify it, cleansing it by the lavor of water in the word of life, that He might present it to Himself a glorious Church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish. So also ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself, for no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it. As also Christ doth the Church, for we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife, and they shall be two in one flesh. This is a great sacrament, but I speak in Christ and in the Church. Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular love his wife as himself, and let the wife pay reverence to her husband.

Continuation of the Holy Gospel According to St. Matthew (19:3-6)

At that time, the Pharisees came to Jesus, tempting Him, saying, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? Who, answering, said to them, Have you not read that he who made man from the beginning made them male and female? And He said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and they shall be two in one flesh. Therefore now they are not two, but one flesh. What therefore god hath joined together let no man put asunder.

The Saving Words of the Gospel.

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, the Holy Ghost. Amen.

Transcription of Sermon

A marriage during Christmas season makes perfect sense. During this time, we celebrate and thank Our Lord for the mystery of His Incarnation. In some early Church Fathers, patristic writers, often spoke of the Incarnation in matrimonial terms. They saw this as a marriage between the divine and human nature in Christ. And in marriage, there are certain qualities that are necessary for it to be a true marriage. It has to be faithful; that means exclusive. It has to be fruitful; therefore, open to life. It’s forever; there’s no plan B. And it has to be free; consent is asked and given. And so, in this analogy, the Fathers often saw something of that in the mystery that we’re celebrating in this season of the Incarnation: the marriage of the divine and the human nature.

But of course, Thomas Aquinas said the analogy is fine, but it starts to fall apart once we look at each one of those aspects, because there’s one that’s missing and its consent; asking. He says, who’s asked? Christ takes upon Himself human nature, not another human person. And so, he said this doesn’t seem to really work until he stumbles on… later on, in his writing, he stumbles on this beautiful passage from St. Bernard of Clairvaux, and there is the solution. Consent is asked by God the Father, by means of the Archangel Gabriel, to His greatest human person ever made; the Blessed Virgin Mary. And she is the one who gives the consent. And so, there is present this freedom, this exchange of persons.

Soon, consent will be asked and given. Promises will be made. And we will witness this mystery that Paul spoke about in Ephesians. And what a beautiful time to do this on the eve of the Feast of the Holy Family. 

When Alexander and Carolina picked this date, I think it was providential. They’ll be able to look forward to every anniversary, remembering that we were married on the eve of the Holy Family. If the Incarnation is akin to marriage, Christmastide, then for us is a school in which we learn from the Holy Family; from Mary and Joseph, from the shepherds, from the Magi. one simple and -all-encompassing lesson, and that’s to adore Christ. To adore Christ. And your task as you start to form a family, which we pray will be also a holy family, is simply that: to have Christ as the center of your marriage and together to adore him. And when he entrusts you with children who will be more his than yours, to teach them to adore him. Your vocation is not to marriage. Your vocation is to each other in marriage and each other bound up by Christ himself. It’s so important to remember that the grace, the sacramental graces you will receive at the moment you make your promises, your vows, that you are infused with sacramental grace from on high in order to live that out with perfection. Don’t forget that these graces accompany you. They’re not left behind on the day of your marriage. There’s something that will accompany you as an assistance in order to become a truly holy family.

None of us can grasp how much the Father longs for our love. And so, He gives us sometimes icons of this. We look at the Holy Family as an Icon of the Trinity. And then, every family, every Catholic marriage, after that is something of an imitation of trinitarian lives. Mary and Joseph saw every aspect of their lives in a relationship to Christ, so much so that their work, their prayer, their rest, their recreation became all a piece of this surrender to Christ; worship, for which we were all created. Christ bound it all together.

And today, as you commit yourselves to each other in Christ, you’re called to do the same as Mary and Joseph. Your lives rooted in Christ, surrendered to Him, in imitation of Him. And these members of the Holy Family and all of the cast of characters that we see in Bethlehem, the Magi, the shepherds, Mary and Joseph, and indeed all of these people here, your loved ones, support you in this endeavor because it’s more God’s than yours. And you’re simply saying yes to God’s plan as the Blessed Mother said yes to God’s plan.

And so, I ask you all, not only to pray for this couple today, but to continue praying that they cooperate with the grace that they will surely receive at the moment of their vows.

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.  

~Fr. Ermatinger